I was rowing in a boat, across choppy water, returning from a long journey.  I think I had been at the Island of Manifestation, a place I go in my inner landscape to place intentions and entreat the powers.

I rowed up to the shore, but I was utterly beyond exhaustion and I had a lot of trouble bringing the boat in.  I noticed my body was wasted, emaciated, like I’d been fasting on the island.  Had I been an ascetic?  I was met on shore by my anima and bunch of others, who half-carried me, half-walked me up to my anima’s room.

She sat me down at the table and insisted I try to eat something.  She gave me a spoonful of some white, pearly liquid, but I barely had strength to eat, and I found my body collapsing.  I let it go, and without really meaning to, I disengaged from my body.

Now I was formless, a kind of shapeless ball hovering over the table.  Everyone in the room looked up at me, and they started talking about whether I would return to the body.  It was clear in my mind that I could choose to go back in or not — that it was entirely up to me; but I didn’t like the idea of not having a body, so I re-engaged.  My anima helped me to a bed and fed me more, and as she did so, I felt slightly more enervated and awake.

I became aware of Apollo and some of my other guides standing nearby.  Apollo was glad of my decision to return, and also congratulated me on finishing my time on the Island.  I asked why my body was so weak, what the purpose was, and he replied I would find out one day.  I could only laugh.

Side note:  as I worked on re-engaging with the body, I noticed a sensation that reminded me of restless legs syndrome (which I suffer from a little), and I was felt like it was caused by not being fully in the body.  I felt that I needed to work on being more present in my joints and limbs.  To do this, one must simply think of them, feel them, be with them.  They are jumping around because they need attention!